us vs them

​When speaking with your teams (or even within earshot) do you ever slide into criticism, blame, disagreement, anger, frustration or accusations in regard to messages/ directions from senior management ?
Come on, be honest. Do you ever say “they said we have to…” or “this is what we’ve been told to do by…” etc. etc.
Believe me when I say, it’s extremely common, and extremely toxic.
When I hear this (and to be honest I hear it a lot, and I've have had numerous coaching conversations about it) it's not only a cultural canary in the coalmine, it tells me straight up that this person has leadership lessons yet to learn. And that’s okay, but we need to work diligently on removing any Us vs. Them language.
Think about it for a sec. Your team generally follows your lead, your shadow, your words and actions more than anyone, on site. And this form of communication encourages the very opposite of interdependence.
Now don’t get me wrong. I fully empathize with the fact that there can be many pills that are hard to swallow. However, what we need to do is process this internally, with our peers or our leaders (that’s part of their support role for you).
It doesn’t work to try and seek team favour or soften a blow by blaming ‘them’. Your credibility and integrity withers.
As leaders on any level it is a hugely significant responsibility to work through, and out the other side, of challenging messages, find the positives and deliver accordingly.
No one said your job was easy.